Musings About A Muddled World: My Year Of "So What"

I know everyone have set and perhaps, broke their New Year's resolutions already but I'm not in the league of trying to lose weight. In fact, I've chosen for some years not to say I'm trying to be in better shape because I'll get the same response - the rolling of the eyes or someone saying something sarcastic like "where?"

I'm taking another route this year especially after I saw Dubya at the end of last year saying: "So what a guy throws a shoe at me (shrug of the shoulders)," then I remembered his sidekick Darth Vader (I mean Dick Cheney) saying "so" when ABC's Martha Raddaz asked him about Americans feeling their administration made a mistake on Iraq. Imagine that!

I thought to myself "Wow," what if I could be that cavalier about many things going on in my life or in America and just say "so what!" After all, Pink (love her) made a hit song about the catchy phrase - So what she got a divorce; have her ex appear on the video about the failure. Talk about a gutsy girl.

So here are some of my musings to "So what". . .

So what I'm blunt. If you can't handle the truth, don't ask me my opinion. If you're dating a prince, I'll express my admiration and if you're dating a frog - boy will you get an earful. Or you'll just get silence. I'm not a politician and I'm not trying to win a base.

So what I'm quite tall and still not afraid to rock my high-heels (like the 4 and 1/2 inches I'm wearing today). I own my height and I think everyone should own (or fake) theirs. Besides, I get the insane pleasure of knowing a guy has to focus on my real eyes and not elsewhere and could catch him if he does.

So what I'm a girl who like sports and can question the fundamentals of an athlete's basketball game to the surprise of some but can still relate "sex and the city" (my girly side) to everyday life.

So what I'm a "Scorpio." I don't know what the fuss is about with this sign when I tell someone my birth date - "Oh you're a Scorpio . . ." Yes I am. And though I'm sweet, I'll sting you if you keep bugging the living daylights out of me - with a smile:-)

So what I'm smart, stylish and dare I say sexy. I don't think those traits should be mutually exclusive. And I'm tired of suppressing who I am to please others insecurities. In the words of Nelson Mandela "who are you not to be gorgeous, talented, . . .your playing small doesn't serve the world." I'm trying to follow his advice.

So what for the first time in my adult life I found myself unemployed even after doing everything right. I needed the rest at first (a humorous way to look at my plight), and I increased in knowledge of who I am during these times.

So what I fail at an endeavor or experienced a setback. At least I tried something. That's more to say than folks staying in the depths of their indecision.

So what I'm this multi-dimensional, hard to figure out, can't-be-placed- in-a-box kind of girl. I'm logical yet have a deep abiding faith, analytical yet creative, realistic (to the outside world) but as a Matriarch of the family told me: "more idealistic" internally. If you can't deal with that . . . too bad, next